


Common

by Outofangband



Category: TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works & Related Fandoms, The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Angband, Maedhros and Maeglin friendship, Mentioned Abuse, Valinor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-07
Updated: 2019-02-07
Packaged: 2019-10-24 03:24:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17696729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Outofangband/pseuds/Outofangband
Summary: (More Maedhros and Maeglin friendship. Maeglin’s guilt that part of Maedhros’s alienation from the rest of the Eldar is partly because of his actions. If he hadn’t given in maybe others who had the misfortune of receiving Morgoth’s personal attention wouldn’t be so hated. And he himself was barely even hurt…)(Part One: Knowing)





	Common

**Author's Note:**

> (takes place either in a re-embodied Valinor or an alternate timeline)
> 
> (also posted to @outofangband on Tumblr where I post headcanons, fiction, and art!)

Maedhros sat on a stone wall that was long enough to reach beyond the edges of his vision on both sides. A grassy field lay behind him. Wind rippled through it sending the fresh scent of plant life through Maedhros’s senses. Closing his eyes, he takes a moment to breathe and to emerge in his surroundings, an unusual occurrence in his day to day life. He rarely felt safe or calm enough to attempt full mindfulness. His legs sway slightly and the breeze lifts up the ends of his hair.

The peace cannot last, of course. Less than five minutes later, the sound of footsteps somewhere ahead of him in the forest he is turned towards cause Maedhros to open his eyes quite suddenly. He is not afraid… but wary. Head tilted slightly to the side, Maedhros closes his eyes again, this time in concentration. His hearing is extremely astute and though his eyes have learned to pick up the smallest of details, in a sea of light greens and nearly identical trees that outline the old forest, he is much more likely to get information from his ears. His plan is to hop off his perch on the wall to head home as soon as he can tell for sure that the approaching being is not one who means him harm.

When the elf comes into view, however, Maedhros does not leave the wall. Nor does he judge them as wishing to harm him. It is Maeglin, looking slightly lost. Unsure whether the younger elf wanted his thoughts interrupted, Maedhros waited for him to speak, if he was going to. Maeglin’s head was down, his brow furrowed in thought. He had completely left the forest and was inches away from Maedhros’s left foot when he noticed his distant relative. His eyes widened in an almost exaggerated way.

“Ne-Nelyo?” he stammers, taking a step back, clearly fearful he had disturbed Maedhros or otherwise done something wrong. Maedhros nods.

“Hello,” he greets calmly. Maeglin takes a breath and finds what words he wants.

“S-sorry if I bothered you,” he says hastily, “I did not think anyone would be here. I have never seen anyone here before though…” he blinks, “I suppose that is why you come here?” He curses himself, shaking his head, “I am sorry. Was that rude? I mean…I did not mean to be rude?”

Maedhros gives a small smile, “You are alright,” he assures him, “It is true I come here to be alone but you are hardly who I am avoiding.” He slips off the wall, looking quizzically at the younger elf.

“Are you as well hiding?” he asks gently.

Maeglin shrugs. “Just walking,” he says, “I like the quieter places. Like you, I guess. Have a nice day.” He cringes inside. He was still not sure how he wants his interactions with Maedhros to go, especially since after his first visit with the older elf, the quiet rumors and suggestions had turned to infuriatingly gentle words of congratulations. I’m so glad you got to speak with him, you two can help each other. Though he knew what they meant. I’m so glad that two elves I do not trust have decided to seek each other’s company rather than mixing with us. And it was the reason they felt this way that enraged Maeglin. Perhaps there were actual reasons for wanting to avoid either of them with the kinslayings and whatever else Maeglin had done but that didn’t seem to be on the minds of the other elves, or at least not in their whispers and rumors. No. It was that they had been prisoners and had the audacity of sparking the Dark Lord’s interest. These…idiots who knew nothing about what He could do. Maeglin shakes his head, takes a breath, and starts to walk again.

Maedhros plans to bid him goodbye but, to his surprise, the younger elf is following him, quickening his pace to catch up.

“C-can I walk with you?” he asks, stuttering again.

“Of course!” Maedhros replies, surprised but pleased. The two walk in silence for some time. After about twenty minutes, the outline of Maedhros’s small house becomes visible. Maeglin hesitates for a moment, unsure if he should continue. But he has come this far and now it seems awkward, maybe rude to run off now. If Maedhros lets him in, he will accept.

The older elf does indeed beckon cautiously. “If you want to come in, of course,” he adds blushing slightly. He is still not used to offering or accepting invitations. Maeglin follows him indoors, impressed though a little bemused by all the locks Maedhros has.

The house looks as it did. Organized and minimal with drawings of mushrooms, plants, fossils, and strange creatures on the walls, in addition to the many living creatures Maedhros shared his house with. Jake, who Maeglin had heard, albeit from not very reliable sources, that Jake was a small dragon. If that was true Maeglin would have to rethink other things he had heard about dragons. Jake was slightly grumpy when he had first met him, but quickly became playful and rather friendly, curled up at Maedhros’s feet. As the two elves entered, Jake waddled down the hallway watching them, not seeming to relax until they had both sat down. Maeglin offered a small, shy smile. Maedhros returned it.

“Is there something on your mind?” he asked, gently. Maeglin shrugs. Actually, there were a few things he had wanted to bring up but he didn’t want to put Maedhros on the spot and besides, he could not help but to feel that this was exactly what those who had originally urged him to speak to his distant relative wanted and while his pride could probably bare it, he knew Maedhros had also been the subject of such rumors and whispers and he didn’t want him to feel as though he too agreed with them.

“Do you have nightmares?” Maeglin blurts out. The moment he said that, he wished he hadn’t. It had not been something he had planned to bring up, merely something to end the awkward silence and perhaps act as though he had some real, concrete reason for being here. But now, it seems like an intrusive, rude inquiry. As though this horrible connection between them can be their only bond. Maedhros looks thoughtful, however. Not offended.

“I do,” he answers softly, head tilted to try and see what it is Maeglin is really asking. The younger elf goes red.

“Sorry,” he mutters, “I mean… I do too. But I didn’t mean to ask. Not like that.” He sighs.

“That is alright, I took no offense,” Maedhros says quickly. He pauses, seeming to think.

“If there is something I can help you with, you need not share it with those who have ordered you to come here,” he offers lightly, “They are right in one thing, I think you do have some understanding of what they cannot even if there reasons are skewed.” His tone is now forcibly casual.

“Because…because they think He corrupted us,” Maeglin whispers.

Maedhros nods. “Something like that. Though I do not think that is how they would explain it if asked. Not that I would ask.”

“Did he?” Maeglin asks quietly, sounding more and more like a frightened child. Now that this subject had been breached, there was no more pretending that it did not exist, that this visit was merely for pleasantries.

“I do not think so,” Maedhros answers though it pains him. He does not see Maeglin as such, only himself and feels like a liar, someone unworthy and unable to help.

“He didn’t really hurt me,” says Maeglin after a few minutes, “Not in the way others assume. Not like, with whips or knives or anything. He just…” He flinches, watching Maedhros closely, half expecting to be asked to leave once this confession has left his lips. Instead, Maedhros actually looks directly at him, his eyes curious and sad.

“He doesn’t really like those things,” Maedhros says softly, now examining Jake’s tail which rests on his lap, “Considers them crude or something. As though…” he makes a sound somewhere between a gasp of mirthless laughter and a quiet strangled cry. His arm moves convulsively in front of him.

“I…I’m sorry,” Maeglin says, though his mind is racing and for a moment he is almost relieved he was foolish enough to bring up the subject.

“You did nothing, do not worry,” Maedhros murmurs gruffly though he does not sound angry. He raises his head again.

“I am sorry. I am not very good at speaking of this,” he admits. Maeglin almost laughs himself.

“Don’t be sorry for that!” he exclaims, feeling an inexplicable surge of fondness towards Maedhros, “I’m not either! What would that even mean?” Maedhros smiles slightly.

“You are right, I suppose,” he sighs, “I hope you did not feel as though you had to bring this up, not that it is wrong that you did.” Maeglin very much understands the way Maedhros so frequently doubles back on his words, to ensure he had not offended or upset or provoked. He couldn’t help but to wonder how many other similarities they had. _Perhaps some were even merely the result of their kinship,_  he thought bitterly,  _and not their misfortune in sharing such an experience._

“I did not feel that,” says Maeglin slowly, “I mean, I  _was_  encouraged by others. You know how they are, I think. But they want us to just get together and get all our Angband energy out or something.” Feeling more comfortable, Maeglin’s sarcastic personality emerges slightly, earning another amused smile. So much had happened in such a short interaction, Maeglin was beginning to feel exhausted. Maedhros looked that way too.  _Another tally mark in ‘is this just Finwëion blood or post Angband disease_ ’ the younger elf thinks. It’s more amusing to him to consider the other possibility. Something to try and observe when visiting with other, less understanding relatives. Maeglin had the feeling that Maedhros would not be angry if he just fell asleep here though he did not yet want to try it.

This silence was not as awkward and the two of them sat for quite some time, Jake moving his tail to gently tap Maeglin’s leg as well as Maedhros’s so they both had no excuse for not petting him. Finally, Maeglin stretched. His leg was falling asleep but he didn’t want to leave quite yet.

“Can I see your mushrooms again?” Mushrooms were yet another thing that Maeglin had learned was not to be spoken of with just anyone. They grew in dark places, they scared elves who had not experienced them as their only source of light and life. Indeed, Maedhros’s various gardens and collections had several things that Maeglin could not help but to feel were kept private with good reason.

The two of them headed outside into the twilight. Maedhros led Maeglin down into the underground cellar though he left the door open to ensure the outside air and light were present. One wall of the darkened space was completely covered in odd fungal growths, some of which glowed, others twisted like vines. There was a tiny pool with glowing algae. Maeglin felt he could stay and stare for hours. Maedhros really was a genius in this regard, he thought. Finding a way to bring this stuff to life where there was still the presence of the world just safely above. He could feel and smell the air. He takes a step closer to the older elf.

“Should we not like this?” he asks, not really caring about the answer, “I mean…you know what others would say.” Maedhros shrugs.

“This grew in spite of the darkness, not because of it,” he answers, “And I like them, anyways.” Maeglin grins though Maedhros, still looking ahead at the wall can’t see it.

“Can I see your other gardens after?” he asks, “I know you have a lot. Stuff that probably can’t be found in the royal cloisters.” Maedhros smiles himself.

“Of course.”


End file.
